Does My Ex Still Love Me? 10 Real Signs To Watch For Today

Breakups are rough. One minute, you’re sharing memes, inside jokes, and future plans—the next, you’re wondering, “Does my ex still love me?” on a loop. And that question can drive you crazy. 

You replay texts, stalk their socials (no judgment), and over analyze every “Hey, how are you?” like it’s a secret code. Sound familiar? Yeah, you’re not alone.

If you’re here, you’re probably stuck in that awful in-between—torn between fighting for the relationship or finally moving on. Maybe you’re hoping for a sign, a small sign, any sign, that your ex still cares. Or maybe you just need proof it’s really over so you can start healing. 

Either way, you deserve clarity. And that’s exactly what we’re giving you today.

No vague horoscope-level advice—just actual signs experts and real people swear by. We’re talking about the little things (and big things) that scream, “Yup, they’re still not over you.” Or, on the flip side, the behaviors that say, “It’s time to let go.”

By the end, you’ll know whether to fight for what you had… or start packing those emotional bags and leveling up.

Does My Ex Still Love Me? 10 Signs to Look Out For

Here are the real behaviors that scream, “Yeah, they’re not over you.”

1. They Don’t Return Your Stuff

If your ex is holding onto your hoodie, books, or that random charger like it’s a national treasure, pay attention. Sure, maybe they’re just lazy… but more likely? They’re not ready to fully let go. Returning your things means finality—and if they’re avoiding it, they might still be clinging to hope (or just you).

What it means: Keeping your stuff = keeping a connection. It’s their way of leaving the door cracked open, even if they won’t admit it.

Example: You ask for your favorite sweatshirt back three times, and they keep “forgetting.” Meanwhile, you know they’re wearing it in their IG stories. Yeah, that’s not an accident!

2. They Keep “Accidentally” Crossing Your Path

Once or twice? Coincidence. But if you’re suddenly running into them everywhere—your gym, your coffee spot, even your friend’s cousin’s birthday—chances are, it’s not fate. They’re putting themselves in your orbit because they miss you (or at least want to see how you’re doing).

What it means: If they’re going out of their way to be near you, they’re still thinking about you—a lot.

Example: You haven’t seen them in months, but now they’re suddenly at your grocery store on your shopping day? Mmm… suspicious.

3. They’re Hot and Cold (Like, Constantly)

One day, they’re texting you nonstop; the next, they’ve ghosted. Or worse—blocked, unblocked, blocked again. This emotional rollercoaster isn’t just confusing—it’s a sign. If they’re flipping between “I miss you” and “Leave me alone,” they’re struggling with their feelings.

What it means: Mixed signals are unresolved emotions. Your ex might still love you but is scared to admit it (or scared to get hurt again).

Example: They drunk-text you at 2 AM saying they “made a mistake,” then by morning, they’re back to radio silence. Classic.

4. They Have Big Reactions to You

If your ex gets furious over your Instagram posts or shows up at your place crying out of nowhere, that’s not normal post-breakup behavior. Strong emotions means a strong attachment. Anger, jealousy, and even random apologies? All signs they’re not over it.

What it means: If they’re still this emotionally invested, they probably still care—even if they’re bad at showing it in a healthy way.

Example: You post a pic with a friend, and suddenly your ex is in your DMs asking, “Who’s that?” as if y’all are still together. Okay, buddy.

5. They Start Investing More Time In You

If your ex suddenly wants to “catch up” all the time—texting first, calling just to chat, or making plans like it’s NBD—that’s not just friendly behavior. People don’t go out of their way for someone they’re totally over. Time is effort, and effort is feelings.

What it means: They’re testing the waters. If they’re putting in more energy than before, they might be trying to slowly pull you back in.

Example: A month ago, they left you on read. Now? They’re sending you memes, asking about your day, and suggesting coffee “as friends.”

6. They “Slip Up” & Use Pet Names

Old habits die hard—especially the sweet ones. If your ex accidentally calls you “babe” or “love” mid-convo, that’s not just a brain glitch. Using pet names is muscle memory from when you were their person.

What it means: Their heart hasn’t fully caught up to the breakup. If they’re still using your nicknames, you’re still on their mind—a lot.

Example: You’re arguing about who gets the TV in the breakup, and suddenly they sigh, “C’mon, babe, be reasonable.” …Oops.

7. They Send a Spy to Check Up On You

If their best friend, cousin, or even their mom suddenly slides into your DMs like, “So… how are you?”—your ex likely put them up to it. Nobody’s that nosy without a reason.

What it means: They’re too scared to ask you directly, but they need to know what you’re up to. Curiosity doesn’t hit this hard unless feelings are involved.

Example: Their sibling, who never liked you, randomly likes your vacation pics. Hmm.

8. They Keep the Conversation Going

Short replies? Dead-end convos? That’s an ex who’s moved on. But if they’re always the last to text, asking follow-up questions, or dragging out small talk like it’s their job? They’re not ready to let go.

What it means: They want to keep talking to you—because they miss talking to you. Simple as that.

Example: You say “Hey”, and suddenly they’re writing paragraphs about nothing. “So anyway, how’s your cat? Did you ever fix that leaky sink?” Bro, just say you miss me.

9. They Keep Up Your Old Traditions & Habits

If your ex is still doing things you used to do together—whether it’s watching your favorite show, hitting up “your” taco spot every Tuesday, or even keeping inside jokes alive—that’s not just nostalgia. That’s attachment. People don’t hold onto routines that remind them of you unless you still mean something to them.

What it means: Traditions = emotional comfort. If they’re clinging to them, they’re clinging to you in some way, even if they won’t say it out loud.

Example: You used to send each other stupid memes every Friday. Months after the breakup? They still hit you with one out of nowhere. “Just thought you’d laugh.” Uh-huh. Sure.

10. They Answer You Lightning Fast

We all know the “wait three days to text back” game. But if your ex is responding to you instantly—like, read-receipt-to-typing in 0.2 seconds—that’s not casual. That’s priority behavior. Fast replies = you’re still on their mind, all the time.

What it means: If they’re treating your texts like emergency alerts, they’re way more invested than they’re pretending to be.

Example: You send a totally random “Hey” at 11 PM, and before you can even lock your phone? “What’s up?” Damn, they were waiting for that.

5 Signs It’s Time to Move On (For Real This Time)

Sometimes, the answer to “does my ex still love me?” is a hard no. And that’s okay! So if you’re seeing these signs? It’s not mixed signals—it’s a closed sign. 

  1. They’re Dating Someone New (Like, Actually Dating)- If your ex is publicly with someone else—holding hands, posting couple pics, or straight-up calling them “bae”—that’s your cue to exit stage left. What it means: They’ve moved on emotionally. Even if they swear it’s “just casual,” actions > words.
  2. They Treat You Like a Stranger- If they’ve gone from “I know everything about you” to “Oh hey… you”—like you’re some random coworker they barely remember—that’s not them being mature. That’s them erasing your connection. What it means: They’ve detached. No warmth? No love left.
  3. They Never Reach Out First- You could drop off the face of the earth, and they wouldn’t notice. No texts, no “how are you?”—nothing. If you’re always the one starting convos, they’re not missing you. What it means: If they wanted to talk, they would. Silence is an answer.
  4. They’ve Blocked You Everywhere- Not just socials—we’re talking full digital erase. Phone number? Blocked. Venmo? Blocked. LinkedIn? Blocked. That’s not anger—that’s finality. What it means: They’re not just moving on—they’re making sure you can’t reach them. Ever.
  5. They Tell You to Move On- If they’ve literally said, “It’s over”, “I don’t love you anymore”, or “Please stop contacting me”—believe them. People don’t say that unless they mean it. What it means: They’re not playing hard to get. They’re gone.

So… What’s the Verdict? Here’s Your Closure Cheat Sheet

If you’ve been obsessing over “does my ex still love me?”, hopefully, these signs gave you some real clarity. Either they’re still low-key holding on, or they’ve moved on so hard they’ve forgotten your middle name.

Remember, you deserve someone who’s sure about you. If the signs point to “maybe”, that’s still a no. Love shouldn’t be a guessing game. And if the signs scream “over it”? Girl (or dude), believe them. Delete the texts, mute the memories, and go live your main character life.

About Author
About Author

Waithira Njagi is a seasoned wellness and relationship content writer with nearly a decade of experience. Her passion for helping others navigate the complexities of personal growth and connection shines through in her engaging and insightful writing.
With a knack for distilling complex topics into easily digestible pieces, Waithira's work is geared toward readers seeking guidance and inspiration on their journey to holistic well-being.
When she's not crafting engaging articles, you can find Waithira curled up with a stack of romance novels– always rooting for love to win– or enjoying quality time with her beloved family. Her dedication to spreading love and positivity is evident in everything she creates.

Waithira is here to remind you that life, much like their stories, is a tapestry of connections - to loved ones, and the endless adventures found in books.

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