First Date Jitters? Here’s How to Stay Confident and Relaxed

Whether you’re swiping through apps, getting set up by friends, or meeting someone IRL, that first date feels like a high-stakes game. You want to make a good impression, keep the conversation flowing, and, honestly, just not embarrass yourself. But those first-date jitters!

Your palms might be a little sweaty, your heart might be racing, and your brain is probably overanalyzing every word you say. Basically, first date jitters are in full effect. And chances are, your date is feeling it, too!

So, how do you overcome this? How do you not only present as confident but also feel it when going on a date for the first time? How do you be that guy/girl?

Well, this article is your ultimate guide to staying cool, calm, and collected on that first date. Those first day jitters are overwhelming, but they don’t have to ruin your vibe. Whether you’re worried about awkward silences, saying the wrong thing, or just not clicking, we’ve got you covered.

So, if you’re ready to ditch the jitters and walk into your next first date feeling like the main character, keep reading.

8 Ways to Calm First Date Jitters

If you feel overwhelmed by your first date jitters, you may be worried that they will ruin the whole date. That’s why it’s important to get a handle on them before then. Here are a few ways to calm those nerves and walk into your date feeling like the confident, amazing person you are. 

1. Meditate/Pray

Meditation or prayer is a good way to manage the butterflies of a first date. Praying or meditating is about grounding yourself, taking a few deep breaths, and reminding yourself that you’re enough, just as you are.

Meditation helps calm your nervous system, while prayer can give you a sense of peace and reassurance. Both are about focusing on the present moment, not the “what ifs” running through your head. So, find a quiet spot, close your eyes, and take slow, deep breaths. Or, take a few minutes to connect with your faith and ask for calm and confidence.

You can even do it while you’re sitting in your car before the date. 

2. Visualize Positivity

First date jitters love to make you imagine every possible awkward scenario. But what if you decide to imagine something better? Visualization is all about picturing the best-case scenario instead of the worst.

When you visualize success, your brain starts to believe it’s possible. Close your eyes and imagine the date going perfectly. Picture yourself smiling, laughing, and having a great conversation. See yourself feeling confident and relaxed. 

The more details you add, the more real it feels. For example, think about how you’ll feel when your date compliments your outfit or laughs at your joke. 

3. Talk with a Friend

Sometimes, you just need to vent or get a little hype from someone who knows you best. Talking with a friend before your date can be a game-changer for calming those first date jitters. Your friends know your worth, and they’ll remind you of it when you’re doubting yourself. Plus, talking it out can help you process your nerves and feel less alone.

So call or text a trusted friend before walking out the door. Tell them how you’re feeling, and let them hype you up.

4. Give Yourself a Pep Talk

First date jitters can come because you’ve forgotten just how awesome you are. That’s where a pep talk comes in. Become your own hype person because who knows your strengths better than you?

That talk will help you shift your mindset from “What if I mess up?” to “I’ve got this.” You will also remind yourself of your worth and focus on what you bring to the table.

You can stand in front of a mirror and say positive affirmations out loud. Keep it simple, but say it like you mean it.

5. Walk Before the Date

Sitting around can bring on the first date jitters, so dont. Walk instead. Walking helps burn off some of that nervous energy and gets your blood flowing. Plus, being outside can help clear your head and put things in perspective.

Take a 10-15 minute walk. It doesn’t have to be far—just around the block or through a nearby park. Focus on your surroundings, take deep breaths, and let your mind relax. By the time you get back, you’ll feel calmer and more ready to tackle those first date jitters head-on.

6. Listen to Music

Music can pump you up, calm you down, or just make you feel like the main character in your own rom-com. And when it comes to first date jitters, the right playlist can work wonders. Upbeat tunes can boost your confidence, while chill vibes can help you relax. It’s all about setting the tone for how you want to feel.

So, if you haven’t already, create a playlist of songs that make you feel good. Add your favorite hype tracks or some soothing jams, and press play while you’re getting ready or on your way to the date.

By the time you park, those first date jitters are nowhere to be found. You’re just vibing, ready to have a good time.

7. Research the Venue

Fear of the unknown— that is sure to put butterflies in your tummy right? What if the place is too loud? What if you can’t find parking? What if you show up underdressed? It’s a lot but a little research can take the edge off.

Knowing what to expect can help you feel more in control. When you’re familiar with the venue, you can focus on the date itself instead of worrying about logistics. Therefore, look up the place online. Check out the menu, read reviews, and even scope out photos if you can. 

No surprises, no stress—just you, your date, and zero first date jitters.

8. Do a Self-Care Routine

First date jitters can make you forget to take care of yourself. Then you show up at the date stressed and regretting not taking better care of yourself. So, take time to care about yourself. 

When you feel good, you look good, and when you look good, you feel confident. A little self-care can go a long way. Do whatever makes you feel your best. That could be a skincare routine, a quick workout, or even just taking a long, relaxing shower. Then, you’ll be ready.

How to Remain Relaxed and Confident on Your First Date

Once you’re actually on the date, there are plenty of ways to keep your cool and show up as your best self. Here’s how to stay relaxed, confident, and totally in control:

Dress Confidently and Comfortably

If you’re rocking an outfit that feels like you, those first date jitters won’t stand a chance. When you feel good in what you’re wearing, it shows. You’ll walk taller, smile brighter, and feel more like yourself. Plus, comfort is key—you don’t want to be fussing with your clothes all night.

Therefore, pick something that fits well, suits the vibe of the date, and makes you feel amazing. Test it out beforehand to make sure you can move, sit, and eat without stress.

This way, you’re not worried about your outfit—you’re just focused on having a good time.

Research Conversation Topics

First date jitters love to show up when your mind goes blank. But knowing what to talk about takes the pressure off. It keeps the conversation moving and helps you avoid those awkward silences.

So, think of a few light, fun topics ahead of time—like travel, hobbies, or favorite shows. Avoid heavy stuff like exes or politics. Keep it casual and interesting. For example, if your date mentions they love hiking, you can ask about their favorite trails. 

Learn About Positive Body Language

Your body language says a lot before you even open your mouth. Nailing it can help you feel and look more confident. You see, positive body language—like good posture, eye contact, and smiling—makes you appear relaxed and approachable. It also helps you feel more in control.

Therefore, sit or stand up straight, keep your arms uncrossed, and lean in slightly when your date is talking. In addition, smile naturally and make eye contact (but don’t stare them down).

When you’re sitting with your shoulders back, smiling, and nodding as your date talks, they will feel heard, and you will feel confident. 

Set Realistic Expectations

First date jitters often come from putting too much pressure on the night. You can alleviate it by keeping it chill by setting realistic expectations.

Reminding yourself that this is just a casual meet-up—not a life-changing event—helps you relax. It’s about having fun, not finding “the one” right away. So, go into the date with an open mind. And focus on enjoying the moment, not overanalyzing every little thing.

Focus on the Present Moment

Finally, it’s important to remember that first date jitters drag your mind into the past or future, so you need to fight to stay in the moment. 

Staying present keeps you grounded and calm. When you focus on what’s happening right now, you’re less likely to overthink or stress about what’s next. So, pay attention to your surroundings, your date’s words, and how you’re feeling in the moment. If your mind wanders, gently bring it back.

Stay Calm, Confident, and Crush It!

First date jitters? Consider them handled!

Nerves are normal—they just mean you care. But they don’t get to call the shots. You’ve got the tools, the confidence, and the vibe to turn those jitters into a night you’ll actually enjoy. 

So take a deep breath, walk in with your head high, and own the moment. First date jitters don’t stand a chance against you.