Guide To Dating A Recently Divorced Man

So, you’re dating a recently divorced man—I guess the divorce part shouldn’t matter. But it does, no matter how much you try to ignore it. It’s okay though; it means you know what you are getting yourself into. Or at least, are ready to embrace it.

Dating a recently divorced man should not be different. But it is. After all, divorce is one of those life-changing experiences. Nobody walks into a marriage hoping to get divorced, so it will affect those involved in one way or another.

Worse, it may affect you even though you were never in the marriage to begin with. So, is there an art to dating a man who just came out of a marriage without all the awkwardness and other concerns?

Some have perfected it and go by a strict guideline. Others wing it because every divorced guy is different. If you are here, you’re hoping there’s a solution to not step on his toes or trigger something.

Yes, you can date a divorced man successfully. Just explore the guide below to discover what may win his heart and what toes hurt the most when you step on them. 

Is There A Plus To Dating A Divorced Man?

Before jumping into the pool, you’re probably asking if it is even worth it. You are not wrong for wondering. After all, it’s not like divorced men come with advantages over those who’ve never been married. Or do they? I suppose it depends on how you look at the situation and, of course, the man. 

A Recently Divorced Man Could Be Emotionally Mature

The keyword here is ‘could,’ but yes, dating a man who just came out of a marriage could mean you end up with someone with emotional maturity. He may have learned from all his past experiences by being forced to reflect on his actions and emotions. As a result, he could be more self-aware and better at handling the ups and downs of emotions in a relationship.

He is Independent

Dating a divorced man could be a way to get emotional fulfillment without worrying about him being clingy. It’s because he may have already established independence. If that’s the case, he would not be needy because he had learned to take care of himself. 

He Has Experience

Dating a recently divorced man means you are dating someone with experience. It’s one of the lovelier perks of getting out of a marriage. He has been in a committed relationship before and knows (or at least has an idea) what works and what does not. If he has learned from his mistakes, it means he is better prepared for challenges. You could be dating one of the most stable men out there. 

A Divorced Man Has Priorities And Will Share

One of the things about getting out of a long-term relationship is that you get to question your priorities and set them straight. 

A recently divorced man has most likely done this and figured out what is important to him. He will likely share these with you, so dating him means there is less guesswork about what he wants. 

You will know exactly what he is reaching for and his expectations of you. It is the bare minimum, but because so many people are deprived of it, it’s an advantage here. 

Four-Point Survival Guide for Dating a Recently Divorced Man

Avoid Talking About the Ex

It’s natural to be curious about his past, but try to steer clear of the ex-talk. Sure, the topic might come up, but it’s best to avoid diving deep, especially if you don’t have anything nice to say.

Negative emotions like anger or hatred are unattractive and could damage your reputation with a recently divorced man.

Speaking badly about his ex might trigger his defense mechanism, making things awkward since they were married, after all.

If he brings it up, just listen and be supportive, but don’t participate.

Also, resist the urge to Google his ex or check her social media. It’s a slippery slope to obsession, and you might end up focusing too much on her. Instead, channel that curiosity into something fun, like following your favorite celebrity gossip.

Take it Slow and be Patient

Remember, he is a recently divorced man, which means he’s still working through some things. You need to take it slow—probably slower than other relationships.

He might be reserved, so don’t expect to meet his friends or family right away. Think about it: you’d probably be cautious, too, right?

Slow relationships can be just as fun. Savor the dates, the electric hand-holding, and the mystery that surrounds him.

Respect his boundaries just like you’d want yours respected. He needs to feel comfortable with you, and over time, he will start to open up.

When he does, you can work together to break down any walls and build something special.

Speak Honestly and Openly

A recently divorced man might be feeling down from his divorce, but honesty is key. Don’t lie to get on his good side, even if you want to show support. From the get-go, be honest and open.

Show him you value clear communication. Be upfront about your expectations and any concerns you have.

Also, encourage him to share his beliefs and feelings by making him feel safe and supported. This kind of openness helps to build a strong foundation for your relationship, ensuring it stands the test of time.

Approach Commitment Cautiously

It’s natural to want commitment; it provides security and confidence. You might be tempted to ask about it and wonder if he’s thinking about commitment, too.

While it’s important to have that conversation, approach it with caution. A recently divorced man might still feel vulnerable and traumatized by the idea of commitment.

Bring up the topic calmly, expressing your hopes without putting pressure on him. Ask for his thoughts and goals without judgment.

Let him know he’s safe to share his plans and feelings with you. This approach helps you both navigate the relationship’s future with care and understanding.

Don’t freak out if…

You look like her

If you find yourself resembling his ex, don’t worry—it’s not as weird as it might seem. Chances are, his taste hasn’t changed much. A recently divorced man is not necessarily looking for a replacement; he just likes what he likes.

If he asks you to change things about yourself to look more like her, it’s time to run. Until then, take it as a compliment and remember that you are unique and special in your own right.

He chooses his kids

Yes, he might choose his kids over you sometimes, and that’s completely normal. He is a parent first, and it shows he is responsible.

Don’t take it personally if he cancels a date to take care of a sick child. It would be more concerning if he didn’t prioritize his kids.

This is a logical part of his life, so be ready for it. Understand that his commitment to his children is part of what makes him a good person.

He can’t take you to a fancy place

Divorces can be expensive, and a recently divorced man might have lost some of his savings. He may have other financial responsibilities like a mortgage or kids to support.

Don’t freak out if he can’t take you out on fancy dates or vacations right away. This doesn’t mean he doesn’t want to make you happy.

Be patient, enjoy the simple moments together, and give it time. As things settle down, you might find yourselves having those fancy dates in the future.

Find the Divorced Guy and Date Him

Statistics for divorce rates show that it’s harder to find that ‘I do’ virgin. So don’t run away from a recently divorced man.

Give him a chance because he could be exactly what you need.

Be patient, and enjoy your time with him. Remember, dating someone who has been through a divorce can be a rewarding experience if you approach it with understanding and an open heart.

With the right mindset and these helpful tips, you might just find that a recently divorced man is the perfect match for you.

Happy dating!